Grin and Bare It All
by Moofy-Fan
Summary: There was really nothing else to do now but grin and bare it all. People never noticed anything else if you were smiling anyway, and that was something Cooro was very good at. Cooro Centered.
1. Grin and Bare it All

Hello. I was struck with an inspiration bunny and decided to make a little oneshot about Cooro and his views of the others and the situation they get into in the tenth book. He's such an interesting character, you know? Especially as the series progresses and you see more and more of his mind. That being said, there are some spoilers for the ending a bit, so you've been warned.

Disclaimer- Don't own +Anima

Grin and Bare It All

There were two things in Cooro's life that he treasured beyond all others. The first of these two things were, of course, his friends.

When he'd first set out on this little journey of his, he expected to meet other animas, and he had hoped he would have been able to become friends with them. He never expected that the people he met to be so amazing and kind, well, over all at least, and he certainly didn't expect to become so close so fast.

There was Senri, the oldest and quietest of the group by far. The Kim-um-Kur bear anima was like a protective force over all of them. Although he sometimes needed help from them in the more basic of social interaction, none of them ever really cared about that or feel anything except maybe worry for the teen when those situations did occur. After having known Senri for about a week, none of them ever really questioned why he kept silent, it was just who he was.

Then there was Nana, the girl of their group. She and him were alike in a lot of ways, actually, although she was much more spunky, he guessed he could call it. They both liked picking on Husky, jokingly of course, and were generally the more upbeat and talkative two of the four. They were also the two less adept in an actual fight. Now, while he did get into dangerous situations sometimes, he was never really useful in combat. Yes, Nana did have her sonic screech, but she used it mostly for defense. While Senri and Husky were the two to go to if you needed protecting or a challenge, they were much more flighty. Maybe that's why they were the ones with wings.

And of course Husky. The ex-prince who'd been introduced to him as a princess. They really were as different as night and day. Husky was headstrong and determined and all these things that made the black haired boy look up to him. It wasn't hard for Cooro to think of the stubborn silver boy as a brother to him, although he wasn't really sure if it was the same both ways. Cooro never had any siblings, while Husky had a multitude. They hadn't been very kind to him either, so if Husky didn't think of him as a brother, he didn't really mind. It was most likely not an insult. A best friend was probably closer then a brother to him any day.

The other thing, was his wings. He'd had them for as long as he could remember and had often taken the flight they gave him for granted. Things had changed once he met the others though. They had suffered to get their animas, and that and the usefulness they provided him really started to make it sink in how valuable they were.

And then just like that, his world was ripped from him. All because of that stupid anima race. All because of an overheard conversation. His friends were gone, any confidence to stand up to Fly was gone, and he didn't know what to do.

They all had just ran away. First Nana, the betrayal she felt very clear. Then Husky, who'd just gone forward without even looking back, which was so typical of him, and finally Senri. It was obvious he hadn't known what to do, but Cooro told him to just go with the others. He didn't have the right to keep him there.

This was really it now. He'd already lost one of the two most important things in his life, and was about to lose the other. There wasn't anything he could do to stop it though. He made a promise. A stupid, stupid promise when he was six years old for some apples. He'd gave his word though, and Cooro just couldn't say no.

It didn't really matter anymore though. What he lost or what he was going to lose. He wasn't even sure what he was anymore. A fake anima? A real one? Maybe he was something like Blanca, only more stable. There was no way to get an answer though, so there was no reason to try.

There was really nothing else to do but grin and bare it all. His life had been far from perfect, but there had never really been a way to make it better. Whenever he thought he had though, it would come crashing down, again and again and again. When he first realized the fear people held for him because of his wings, when he'd came to the research facility to help, because he had been deemed special, and now.

It was the strategy he'd used in the past, and it would do very well now too. People never seemed to notice anything else if you were smiling, and that was something Cooro was very good at.

Yes, he'd grin and bare it for now, and once all this was over and the last bits of everything dear to him was taken, he'd be able to stop. He'd be at rock bottom, and there was no reason for him to try and raise himself up. There'd be an end to it all, and no reason to ever have to put on a mask again.

* * *

Well, that was kind of dark. I hope you liked it though. First +Anima oneshot, so I tried my best. I tried to get his mindset right. He really seemed to be at the end of his rope, especially at the funeral crow hill things and the whole driven to suicide scene. If it makes you feel any better the other show up and save him before anything actually happens, so yay.

Well, please review.


	2. With a Smile

What in the world am I doing? Yeah, this was originally a oneshot, and you think it would stay that way seeing as it's been two years since I first posted it. Apparently not though, since I got struck with an overwhelming urge to write angsty Cooro, and ended up thinking of a second chapter.

I wrote this entire thing while listening to Disarm by The Smashing Pumpkins on repeat, since I think it really matches Cooro extremely well right now. But yeah, random sequel chapter go~

With a Smile

Cooro had been wrong about one thing. He wasn't able to immediately end it after his wings were taken, instead stuck in a small bed, staring blankly at the wall in front of him while he tried to work up the strength to bare the pain so he could leave.

He didn't have any idea where he was going to go yet. He didn't have any place left to go to. He just knew he had to get away. As far away from Astar and Fly and the pain as he physically could.

The black haired child didn't even twitch when the door to his room opened. He didn't bother to look over to see who it was, knowing that there weren't too many options to begin with. It wasn't like he cared who it was anymore anyway. There wasn't anything else they could do to him now, besides help him recover from the surgery as fast as he could so that he could get out of here.

"How are you doing, Cooro?" the horribly chipper voice managed to cut through the fog that clouded his mind, and the child looked up to see Fly standing at his bedside. He was smiling down at the black faced boy, as if he couldn't tell there was anything wrong with him at all. It wouldn't surprise him if he truly couldn't, too wrapped up in his own good fortune and used to seeing the normally hyper and carefree boy so reserved.

Cooro wondered if he'd already gone through with his own surgery and had his wings now. He couldn't sense +anima anymore, so he didn't have any idea. It seemed as if Fly had almost read his thoughts though, or he just didn't expect him to actually answer his question, so he continued talking.

"I wanted to come and see how you were recovering before and I went and got the implantation done," he said. Slowly Cooro nodded as the information sunk in his head. He wasn't a +anima yet. He was about to be though. About to take the anima Cooro had cherished his entire life for himself.

The black haired boy had never wanted to scream so badly before. To just break down and yell at him. Those were _his _wings! He wanted them back! He wanted it all back! His wings and his friends. It wasn't _fair_. He shouldn't be allowed to take _everything _from him!

Instead, he found a large smile plastered on his face, and he nodded once again, a bit more forcefully this time around. The surprise that the action caused Fly was easy to see, but Cooro didn't let himself focus on that. That he hadn't smiled for Fly in years now. Not since the realities of his promise, and the fact that he was actually intending to force the small boy to keeping it sunk in.

"Thanks!" he said happily, "I'm sure you'll love the wings. They really are amazing," he finished. It took the older man a moment to process what he was saying, and once he did he nodded in agreement. A small smile was still plastered on his face, as if he didn't notice the way that Cooro's eyes were shinning with a thick layer of water, or how his voice cracked ever so slightly as he spoke.

"I'm sure I will. And don't worry, I'll take good care of the anima for you," he said, and Cooro nodded, still wearing the unsettling cheery smile.

"Right. I don't know anyone who wouldn't like flying. Well, Husky said he doesn't like it, but I think that's only because I crashed into a lake the first time I was carrying him," he rambled a bit. The smile lowered just slightly once the black haired boy continued.

"Don't be mad at the others for not giving up their animas. Husky needs his so that he can feed them, and well, it's hard not to get attached to them. They're what saved Husky Nana and Senri in the first place, so you can't blame them for wanting to keep them," he said. His voice was obviously starting to waver near the end, but he started giggling slightly as if to cover it up.

"I don't have that problem though. I always had my anima, so it didn't actually save me from anything," he declared. Fly nodded, seeming to agree with the particularly desperate grasp at a justification for giving up his wings that Cooro had.

"I'm not mad at them. Like I said, a few anima lost is no big problem, and it'd just be worse to try to force them out and have the animas die," the tall man casually said, shrugging his shoulders slightly. Cooro agreed silently. He was just barely able to hold back a shudder as he imagined how they must have known that something like that would happen to a forcefully removed anima.

He could vividly imagine it as one of his friends, fighting desperately on the operation table to keep their anima, only to have it killed once the researchers refused to give in. The fact that it had to have happened to _someone,_ probably multiple children so that they knew it wasn't just a fluke,almost managed to knock the smile from his face completely.

"Well, it's almost time for me to get going. It's wonderful to see you're making such a good recovery," Fly said, thankfully knocking the black haired boy out of his current train of thought. What Cooro wasn't happy about though was what he was brought back to. Fly was going to implant his wings. He would _never _get to fly again.

He wanted to fight back. He wanted to be like Husky, or Nana or Senri, and tell him no. He needed his anima back! He needed it so that he could find the others and beg for them to forgive him for tricking them, and continue to live the life he was _happy _with. He wanted to so desperately, but just couldn't find the force inside of himself to.

That fire had been smothered a long, long time ago.

"Thank you," was all he could force himself to say instead, somehow managing to keep the smile on his face, but it was quivering. His entire body seemed to be shaking as he tried to cling to the small act of happiness. Fly just nodded and turned towards the door.

He wasn't able to quite shut it all the way before a pained sob burst from the boy, effectively ruining any sort of façade he had been struggling to keep.

The door continued to shut without any hesitation, blocking out the horrible cries of loss that wracked the small child.

* * *

When I said angsty Cooro, I meant it. Yeah, once again, not entirely sure why I did this. I do hope you all enjoyed it though, and as always please review.


End file.
